This blog post is actually a revelation, a looking-back narrative and a story which is especially dedicated for someone who became my friend five years ago when I delegated for 2007 Division Schools Press Conference held at Alubijid National Comprehensive High School, Alubijid, Misamis Oriental on October 3-5, 2007. This true story is inspired from the poem of mine, the Sweet Goodbye, in which I texted to him long ago when we are still textmates. It's very over-acting as in, oh-ey (O-A)! But please bear with me this time. Okay, here we go.

I was still in third year high school when he gave me his yellow baller. (That's why I call him "YB" as in "wai-bi'' for Yellow Baller) "yes, you remember? Of course, you do." For me, that was nothing because in the first place, wala'y malisya, we're friends. I was very innocent with the fact that I felt an admiration for him after all, until Marianne, one of my school publication colleagues way back then, gave his number to me. We texted each other and there, I realized, I have a crush on him. Nyeeh. Again, I assumed that it was nothing because Marianne and him are also texting. Not long after that, the communication was well.. gone. 

And, after one year..
*enumerate names of those twelve months here. January.. February.. March.. December.. ;D*

After one year (I am in fourth year high school in this time already),  a very cute thing happened. I believed it was really cute because I thought this thing only happened in  fiction stories. It really seemed fictitious, impossible and all.. considering that people who  usually met in a road in just a matter of seconds will eventually forget each other and there, forever forgotten. Anyway, that time, I went to Upper Jasaan town plaza to watch the M.O.R. Hiphop Dance Groove. It was a part of the celebration of Jasaan's town fiesta and the recommencing of "Katubigan Festival". I was so surprised because I saw him again. He was one of the The Trysoul dancers from El Salvador City. Well, we gave numbers again and we texted. 

*Insert two months of texting here. <:)* 

There are text messages that disappointed me and there are also that made me happy but that content of the messages was all my secret. I gave in and I just smile with the texts. What I just think in that time was “Kadjot raman ni, 'di nako ni siya makita utro kay taga-layo man ni.” That was my assumption. And I also want to admit to him that it's not Marianne who was his ka-text before but me. It was really me and he's right. I texted him with my name and when we met again, I said it was Marianne at all, not me. Haaha, fool me. Hoy, hello! Ako 'to. Nagbakak 'ko nimo 'tong nag-tell ko na si Marianne imong ka-text. Peace be with you! ;D pero nag-text-text man japon mo diba? So okaaay ra. Heehe.

Okay. Let's continue. Mao 'to. I assumed that it's all alright because he was living faraway from me and well, it's really all fine for me. After a month, the texting sessions were then, gone.

*insert two months of no texting here.*

I graduated and became busy preparing for college. Entrance exams there, registrations here. I was sooo bothered with what course to choose and take. I first preferred BS Computer Science. Next, BS Development Communication, major in Journalism. I thought it would be the final decision of mine. I even processed my scholarship at Xavier University – Ateneo de Cagayan (XU) and got accepted. But I ended up changing minds from here to the other. My mom already forced me to enroll at XU. However, I got the eyes of finding where I would be comfortable then and  insisted to study at Mindanao University of Science and Technology (MUST). Perhaps, because several of my high school classmates are here. I don't really know why, I just like it here. So, I took the entrance exam and got the third rank from 100+ Bachelor of Science in Technology Communication Management (BSTCM) examinees. Yes, you're right. I am so proud. Heehe. Peace. Well, there.

In the middle of processing my enrolment requirements, surprisingly, I met him - again. It was at the medical clinic. Again, naulaw ko, bayooooota! Naka-huna-huna ko sa akong gipang-text. Wuuuuhuuuuhuhuhuuu. *irene was tickled pink then (blushed, kanang namula jud sa kaulaw)* well, anyway, my first year college thereafter, began. 

*insert two months of paningkamot para sa kaugmaon here.*

Last week of June. We met again at the university cafeteria with his friends wherein one of his friends was M. Relacion, my crush, heehe.. and my friend's crush. Haaha. Well, anyway, he got again my number and we texted again. And I want to tell him that his text messages are still in my phone and SIM inbox 2 until now! And my number is 090668... Haaha, nevermind. Ambot lang jud, dili siya ma-erase ayy. walang-hiya na phone! Foooooooine. (^^,)

*insert two months of texting here and I would like to stress that he made insulting messages for me! I hate you. Gasalig.*

After a year, in the summer, his number is already out-of-reach. No GMs, no PMs anymore (Group Messages, Personal Messages). So sad. I want to tell him na memorize pa ka'yo nako iyang number tung-una! Nara oh. 09051738877. I-textmate ninyo? Ayaw na, wala na nah gigamit! Haaaha. *LOL, Laughing Out Loud.*

The last time that he texted me, his message goes like this: “Reng, when ang special exam?” and I replied and that was the last. *tears*

Because of sadness. (Anyway, not really. Nawal-an lang ko ug ka-text. Heehe.) I tried to apply in our student publication, The Trailblazer and hey, after a series of worth-crying interviews and nerve-wracking practical exam, yeeeeehey! I got accepted. I was overwhelmingly happy that I forgot all my problems, all of my sadness, all of my failures, all of my difficult quizzes, grades and all! asdfghjkl.. ug ang resulta?? BAGSAK! Waaaah! Jooooke. I am still a regular student and I am proudly looking forward on being a senior college after March 2012. Okay? Heehe.

While, I was continuing my life, he was also continuing his life. Haaha, alang man! And also, while I was in the Trailblazer, I wrote two poems for him. Some are dedicated to other people. Heehe. Bitaw, these two poems are: Hear my Last Goodbye (Published in Reflections 2010) and Sweet Thursday, Bitter Thursday (Reflections 2011). Heehe, oi! If you want to read those, just visit this address: The Trailblazer's office, Door #2, Student Center, MUST. Then, present your ID, ask for the copies of Reflections 2010 and 2011 from the people out there, scan the Table of Contents and look for the page of those titles, then, cheeeeeeedeng! Maaagic, mabasa na nimo. Haaha. Joooooke. Hmmpfz.. I'm just trying to break the seriousness and sadness of this composition.

I was also the one who covered the volleyball men's division during Intramurals in which he's one of the players. Kakainis ka'yo, makatingala na ako nlang permi ani gaka-assign. Hello, our Trail chairperson? why oh why? (weeh?) Anyway, in 2010, he was part of the CEA's varsity team and in 2011, he was in CIIT varsity team. The reason is obvious, nabalhin siya.  Ambot pud ngano siya nabalhin. Hihi. I will gonna show you some pictures of these games. But let me ukay-ukay sah the file folders of the Trail PC because I guess, our photographers somewhat saved it there. Personal use ka'yo ko. Kwaon nako ang Trail files, guys. Dili man bawal noh? nyaha!

*serious na dayon ko here*

MARCH 23, 2012. I visited my Facebook account and a chat box popped up with the message: "Ring, aha ka?” yeeeh! he's online. We chatted friendly messages and there. Marianne was the topic. Well, I already admitted, okay? So don't ask about her again. Heehe. Huwag na'ng mag-angry bird please. Continue reading.

*insert one hour here.*

I visited again Fb and saw this post and comments on his profile:

I just read these parts. I just can't read the other words due to.. well, my eyes are kinda sick because of  blog, este.. computer radiation. I forgot to wear eyeglasses that time. Fooooine.

“It's so nyc to have a baby of your own..”

“Ninang dayun ko!”

“Maninoy ko gard!”

I stopped moving. Nag-loading ko, then.. okay. I closed my eyes. I nodded. There's no confirmation of this thing since I don't know him very much in person but nag-like dayon 'ko, ika-tulo pa. Ooohwell, move on!

I was not jealous. Not at all, why should I? I just realized that the text fairytale has reached its ending. K, FINE. This is the story's The End.

* * *

I just want to share this fairytale of mine. A fairytale which I want to put a last period. If ever he, too, is reading this one, I want him to know that “Hoy, dili ra ikaw akong crush. Ayaw pag-pineleng bi!” Jokeees. Haaha. I just found a cute love story.. love story? Ah, no, just a cute story in you, a story that worth written for. Thank you because.. because of you, I am kinda matured now, well.. a bit? Heehe. 'compared to what I described myself as a girl who is immature with her feelings but too matured with her thinking. Foooooine, that's it. Thank you because you didn't texted me na and I decided to join Trailblazer and now, I am here in Trail – the source of my strength and the very first reason why I learned to fight. Thank you, because even though we're not that close friends or perhaps, not that friends, you never snobbed me even once. 

Next year, hopefully I will be graduating and I know I will be leaving several friends of mine and that includes you and perhaps, I will not see you again. This blog has no malisya-effect thing but a thank you card and as well, a goodbye or a farewell card to a friend. Well, I just want you to know. Please don't tease me or what, Please don't be angry or be embarassed. Please don't confront me anymore. Basin matunaw ko sa kaulaw. Just act that you don't care, please? I will act that I haven't written anything like this because.. foooine.. it's so kakahiya. Just don't spread this post to any other else. okay? I just want to be honest before my graduation. Heehe. 


Bitaw, please take care of yourself and I hope you are happy with your family and also, well.. with your future family.

Love, love, love,

Reng-reng   

P.S. Take a look of this pictures, if you like.

A picture w/ my SIKLAB Publication colleagues @ Alubijid National Comprehensive High School, five years ago.

Fun, fun, fun! Talk, talk, talk! ;D  This is the yellow baller he once gave me. rot! Naa pani sako hangtod karon. Gusto na nako ilabay. Haaha. joke. This is really the end of my YB insanity!  Bye, bye, my DSPC butterfly! :(

I had a very glamorous day last February 17, 1:00-7:00pm @ SM City, Cinema 2.

I, together with the 31 selected students from Technology Communication Management Department and 7 participants from The Trailblazer Publication (as if hindi ako belong dito sa araw na iyon. Haaha.) attended the SIBYA: The First Northern Mindanao Student Communicators' Congress.

The speakers were from The Rappler including Maria Ressa, a multi-awarded journalist, former Jakarta bureau chief of CNN and former CEO of ABS-CBN Channel 2; Patricia Evangelista, writer, debater, Philippine Daily Inquirer columnist, storyline ANC producer; Chay Hofilena, Ethics of ABS-CBN; and Michael Josh Villanueva, head of digital media and YouScoop of GMA7.

And weeeeh! our team (Irene *me*, Hope, Iyan, Rey-ann, Reynald and Kayze) also won third place in Public Service Announcement Production (PSA) competition. 

The very funny thing there was we celebrated as if we were the champ. Haaha, so big Calda Pizza for the victory party. nyeeeeh. (we are the champ at heart daw! heehe.)

Congratulations, co-communicators!

w/ other BS-TCM participants.

I remember this scenario of ours when I was still a kid. Now, I'm teary-eyed. I just remember that while I'm getting more mature, I almost forgot that my parents are also getting older. Hayzz.

Uhh-ohh-well. Ga-drama-emo-to-the-max npud ko. Heehe. Okay, I'll stop.

So karon. Kay ganahan ko ug Love is.. comic strips, I just want to greet my Nanny a happy, happy birthday in advance. *insert birthday music here*

Her birthday would be on February 25, 2011. Pebrero ka'yo akong mama teh! agud ulitan. Heehe, joke lang! ;D

Happy Birthday, 'Nay!

Love. This word is often considered as the most wonderful feeling in this whole wide world.  Hmmm. Lablab sa tah karon kei gikan man balemtayms de ang show. Hihi, btaw. As what most inlove friends of mine tell me when I ask them to what it feels to be inlove, they just say “Basta, chada ang feeling.” Haaha, mga tapulan jud. Anyway, in that statement alone, we can say love in its nature is indescribable and yes, undefinable. If I were to ask to give meaning to love, perhaps I can’t tell the exact definition because love is so meaningful that it possibly goes beyond any word. It may mean happiness. It may mean wonder. It may mean magic. It may mean fulfilling but often than not, it could also mean pain.

Now, before I go on further, let me share with you this message sent to me by a close friend  of mine this morning.

There. From the quote itself, we can take it that love is always accompanied with pain especially when it is only one-sided love. It could also be that painful when two people love each other and for many years, they thought they will go on in a happily-ever-after but then suddenly, one of the two will fall out of love, then there, the other one will be left hanging. I have heard many cases the same as this from a lot of friends of mine and base from their stories, it really breaks a strong heart. I also experienced this once and it really hurts a lot that it took me a lot of years. From my personality, I know how to hide it but really, it is very painful and I don’t know if I am healed already. Yes, so painful as if the whole world has crushed in just a single bang and well, it feels that there’s no happy tomorrow that will come.

Indeed, very miserable. However, what’s the only solution to that is learn to forgive, let go and move on. It will take time, maybe weeks, months, years or even a lifetime but what matters there is you learn and at the end, you will be thankful because it’s better that you let go of a person who is not for you and destiny gave you a chance to find the person who is really meant for you and will give you the real happiness you actually deserved.

Before I'll be off, let me leave you this passage from the Holy Bible:



Trust the line. Love, truly, never fails. Stay inlove, love, love, love! :-*